how old are you?

22

that’s cool, my father used to be 22.

how are you?

see i find that question too personal. but i will answer it, remind me in a few days. for now i’ll let it sink into my subconscious so it can submerge itself with other subconscious thoughts of mine and that way when it comes back it would get a more homely and personified feeling.

i enjoy nothing and i enjoy it so much that it’s worth living for.

Entry 1 - Confusion:

I’m still confused about the shape of the outline of the field of view of my eyes because I can see the nose blocking the inner sides and then a trace of the eyebrows blocking the upper sides but there seems to be no border at all on the outer sides which makes me wonder why I don’t see everything behind me.

Entry 2 - Things I Love:

I love trains because they remind me of train tracks which remind me of horse tracks which remind me of horse riders which remind me of cowboys which remind me of samurai which I love. I love Parmesan cheese because it reminds me of cheddar cheese which I love far more. I love dark chocolate but not eating wise. I just love it as an entity. I love everything except for things I don’t.

a man walked on a sidewalk and in front of him he saw many things.

he walked by a sign that said: “petition to use people in a coma as temporary scarecrows” and another that said “

you can frame someone for murder if you steal mosquitoes from their house and smear their blood on the crime scene.

Where’s your uncle?

He moved to Japan.

Oh really, why?

The earthquakes help reverse his Parkinson’s disease.

A guy stares at a tornado and says: “Those damn butterflies!”

I saw two zebras walking right next to each other and every white stripe of the first zebra lined up perfectly with every black stripe of the second zebra so that they canceled each other and for a second they both disappeared completely.

That makes no sense.

”here take this present” the old man said handing out a ball to the kid. “it’s a vertical boomerang.”

a vertical boomerang?

yes, it’s a boomerang but it works only vertically. here try it.

the kid throws the ball up and it comes back.

“wow, it works!”

“of course. I’ll sell it to you for 10 bucks”

I can memorize absurdly long number sequences. For instance, I can recite every number from 1 to 10,000 off the top of my head.
if rain falls vertically why do windows get wet?
I tried to commit suicide but I have an identity crisis so I accidentally killed someone else.